Archives For Friendship

Friendship between men, women, single, attached, married, neighbors, coworkers and a whole slew of other social arrangements––human dynamic as multidimensional as an MRI––is perplexing.


Since we honor veterans on November 11, what about friendships in the military? Very intense, especially in war––which is unequivocal hell. People generally die for their buddies as their first allegiance but Duty, Honor and Country certainly underscore the sacrifice of these heroes.

Having said all this, what exactly is the established protocol for dealing with friends? Are there rules of engagement or are they tailored depending on the friend? Communication, for example. A call every month to check in? Once a year? What if I’m an introvert and you’re not. What if I don’t like talking on the phone? Moreover, when someone says, “Call me,” why don’t they call you? What about holidays, birthdays and special events? Is a face-to-face necessary?

It seems then that conduct between friends should be organic, free-flowing, dependent on circumstances and never rigid. Throw in the requisite love with a dash of forgiveness here and there, and I think we have it nailed.

Nevertheless, should we have limited expectations?

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God, I Love To Laugh

September 18, 2012 — Leave a comment

My blood pressure dreams of quiet days when everything is good. But alas, it only takes one brief lap around the Internet track chewing on the news before my blood pressure starts pounding my temple drums with a battering ram. Compound that with my professional and personal life, which are, at the moment, wanting, and one soon starts exploring the options of drinking at 10 a.m. or escaping to Ambienland.

Laugh Cry FreeDigitalPhotos

So I force myself to smile and think about the amazing therapeutic effects of laughter and friendship. All of a sudden, bad things don’t seem quite so bad.

Are joy and humor pearls of grace hand delivered by God?

A Doctor of the Church, St. Thomas Aquinas, writes the following in Summa Theologica: “Just as tears or groans are an effect of sorrow, so laughter is an effect of joy.” And the source of that joy? God!

Fr. James Martin’s book Laughing with the Saints told the following story. In the 1940s, when Blessed Pope John XXIII was still a cardinal and the papal nuncio in Paris, he was at an elegant dinner party, seated across from a woman wearing a very low-cut dress that exposed a good deal of cleavage. Someone turned to him and said, “Your Eminence, aren’t you embarrassed that everyone is looking at that woman?” And he said, “Oh no, everyone is looking at me, to see if I’m looking at her.”

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